For most of us when we think of love we primarily envision a romantic sort of love where it merges with lust and/or sexual attraction. When love is conceived of in this manner it leads us to think that it is something that just happens, and if it happens then it is true love and it will last forever.
This is the version that the company known as The One in the Netflix series “The One” is selling to consumers. The company boasts that with just a single strand of your hair they can match you with your one true love based on your genetics. It sounds too good to be true, but it isn’t. The company can really do this and have in fact done it over a million times. While all this may sound great, in reality it really isn’t. The service itself has wrecked an untold number of marriages. The founders are hiding secrets as to how they even developed the technology in the first place. The science itself that they use to match people with their “one true love” actually shows that there is in fact more than just “one true love” for people. Not to mention that even when they are matched people are in fact able to resist their impulses. The company promised that their service would make the world a better place. It seems to in fact be doing the opposite.
This is not the Christian concept of love.
Perhaps one of the most well known Bible passages, which is often read at weddings, is 1 Corinthians 13.4-8:
Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends.
What is not read is the surrounding context in which these verses appear. In the context Paul is admonishing the Corinthian church for their views and use of their spiritual gifts. This begins in 1 Corinthians 12.1 and continues all the way through chapter 14. Essentially the Corinthians considered some spiritual gifts to be better than others. Paul’s basic response to this is in 1 Corinthians 12.4: all these different spiritual gifts are given by the same Spirit. And later in chapter 14 Paul tells them to exercise these gifts orderly so that the rest of the church will be encouraged and edified.
Sandwiched in between these two chapters is the chapter about love. Now, this is one of the most unfortunate chapter divisions in the Bible because 1 Corinthians 12.31 really, I think should be the beginning of chapter 13. See, the Corinthians have this view that some spiritual gifts are better than others. So, if you have one of the superior gifts you are somehow “better” than those who don’t. Paul is correcting this misunderstanding and telling them that love is not only necessary to use all these other gifts, but that it is also the greatest gift. So he says:
If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.
1 Corinthians 13.1-3
In other words, it doesn’t matter what spiritual gift you are using if you do not have love; without love it is worthless.
You might then ask yourself: “Well how do I know if I am using my gifts out of love or not?”
To which Paul answers:
Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends.
1 Corinthians 13.4-8
Do you know what will end? Prophecies, tongues, and knowledge (1 Corinthians 13.8). All the gifts that the Corinthians thought were superior to all the others and were enamored with will end. Love will not end, and so that is what the Corinthians should be pursuing.
Loving is a difficult task. Not envying the achievements of another is hard. Not bragging about your own achievements is hard. Not being irritable is hard. Not being resentful is hard. Always telling the truth is hard, especially when the truth damages you. All the things that love is described as being are hard.
But you know what? The same Spirit that grants tongues, prophecy, knowledge, and all sorts of other spiritual gifts can also help you attain the gift of love, the greatest spiritual gift. Love comes from God and is given back to God so that the church, the body of Christ, who is the God-man can be built up and strengthened. For the Christian love is always related to God.
For all their peddling of love The One itself survives mainly through the ruthlessness of their CEO Rebecca Webb. She realized that once she discovered this genetic link that she could use it to obtain all sorts of power and wealth. Having now obtained it she goes to whatever means are necessary in order to keep it, including killing those who would threaten it.
Love does requires work, but it does not need to be maintained by fear and threats. The work that love requires is for us to humble ourselves and be obedient to what God has called us to do as Christians. The spiritual gifts that God has given us are for the benefit of others, not our own. Love requires us to change, not others.
Photo by Phạm Chung 🇻🇳 on Unsplash
